Nightmare in Pedro’s bed (The prequel)

I had a nightmare last night. I had a terrible dream that I went to hell. Hell wasn’t what they said it was. Hell was a comedy open mic, with a cover and two-drink minimum and there were also bringers. So you had to bring souls to this hell just to perform onstage and get burned over and over again. I looked around and I noticed a lot of comics there that I knew. I walked up to them and asked what happened? They said, “P I sold my soul for this comedy shit and this I got.” I said, “Yeah dude its hell on earth and selling your soul won’t do nothing but get you stage time. You need talent, skills and faith to carry you the rest of the way.” Then one of them said, “Well nigga you here too.”

He made a valid point. What the fuck I was doing in hell at this eternal open mic? I didn’t sell my soul, I had skills, I was humble. Then I went to the bar and asked can I speak to the host. The bartender said the Devil was in the back making his comedy lineup. Finally the devil came and said what’s up. I was like, “What the fuck I’m doing here son? He asked, “How you got here? You know it’s a two drink minimum?” I said, “Am I on the list my name is Pedro Lee aka John Holmes Jr, Clyde Adams, Driz, Sicker Author, Reign Man, P, P-rock, Ditty, Wan, Mr. Lee, BigDikDynamiteJonez, Smooth nut Criminal, P is sofaking amazing, P-will bender over, and oooohhhhhhh daddy when I’m with the ladies.

He said, “No you not on the list.” What the fuck? He said, “Oh you here because while others was stealing your swag one decided to steal your soul and sell it to boost they career. Those dirty muthafuckas! Then a light shined on me and I awakened. I was drenched in sweat and I look to my left my joke book was on fire. I didn’t even attempt to put it out. I just let that son of a bitch burn. I knew then at that moment, fuck writing shit down I got to go off the top of me head. I’m built for this shit. I was sent here to destroy this system and help rebuild it and save the world from boring as bullshit that we have settled for.

I also realized I cannot do it by myself. Finally, I understand no one was meant to be alone that’s why Adam gave up that rib. So, I decided to align myself with others that go against the grain and also form a group. “The Psych ward” I named it this because anyone these days that can voice they opinion and back it up is considered crazy. Well guess what damn it I got a few screws missing and I’m not finding them bitches, replacing them and I had my brain to damn long to take that bastard back and exchange it or get a fucking refund.

So now I’m on my Quest to bring the most unique thoughts into a visual weapon to attack the stereotypical thinking of what is entertaining. In other words, I just wanted to say I’m back on my standup-comedy grind as other things. But unlike a normal person just saying that, I had to say it my way because I’m not a normal ass person. I also believe (for those who care) that you deserve more than an average story or joke. I’m trying to hit you with reality. Then I hit you with some thought provoking facts. Then to those that don’t know a bit of knowledge and then I top it all off on some joints with some off the wall science fiction shit with a urban twist. So, you get hit with topics and stories at all angles. Also, as I said in 2014 I am going to try my best to hit the blogging daily. This doesn’t mean you have to read them daily (that would be damn nice) I do this for those that can’t come out to check me perform. I’m doing this to show you that I’m on my grind and in the state of mind to rock 24/7.

I’m doing this for me to express myself, to show how I’m feeling that day, etc. It’s also a sample of my thought process. Some people tell you to come check them and support them and they don’t give you a sample of work or any imagination. Well tadaw here it is. I’m doing this to show my thought process doesn’t shut down. Also I like to thank everybody that supported me and came out to my show and my fellow comedian’s shows.

Thanks for everyone that take the time out of their schedules to read my blogs or scan through it. Really big shout outs to those that comment on them and drop them kudos. Thanks for those people that push me to do this shit on and off stage. I’m sorry if it seem like I was slacking and wasn’t getting of my ass. Trust me, I was preparing with strategy to hit everything hard so I wouldn’t disappoint anyone. Sorry for anyone that thought I was throwing a personal attack on them (I wasn’t. Adult up and don’t use me as an excuse for your short comings. Man up you rat bastards). I hate to be so general with the thank you, but thank God I got so many people to give thanks I can’t mention because I don’t want to leave anyone out.

Well I have given my apologies and thank yous. Now it’s almost 2014. Enough with the Emotional back to business. You are all invited to witness a true Genius. I’m a sick one but I’m a damn good one at being sick.